The Baha’i teachings advise everyone to seek competent physicians when they’re ill — yet another reflection of the primary Baha’i principle of the agreement of science and religion. Seeking the…

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Over the last year, I felt as if I had reached an impasse in my life. I likened my life to a sturdy tree, one built on the roots of…

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When I was 5, I saw the words “God Is Dead” on a record jacket at one of my parents’ parties. Knowing nothing of Nietzsche, existentialism, or other 20th century…

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There is an African proverb that says, “When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you.” So, how do you find peace of mind and heart?

In a world of distracting chaos, depressing conflict, distressing challenges, and addictive consumerism, finding inner peace can feel elusive. Yet, timeless spiritual and religious teachings offer helpful insights and comforting prayers to guide all of us on our journeys. 

Explore how the following quotes and prayers from world religions and ancient spiritual traditions can unlock a peaceful, resilient spirit and bring tranquility to both your heart and mind.

Baha’i Quotes About How to Find Peace of Mind and Heart

If you’re wondering how to find peace of mind and heart, the Baha’i writings offer helpful guidance on this subject. 

First, we can’t have a peaceful mind and heart without having a loving mind and heart. At a talk in New York in 1912, Abdu’l-Baha, one of the central figures of the Baha’i Faith, was asked, “Is peace a greater word than love?” 

Abdu’l-Baha exclaimed, “No! Love is greater than peace, for peace is founded upon love. Love is the objective point of peace, and peace is an outcome of love. Until love is attained, peace cannot be…”

When we are kindled by the fire of the love of God in our hearts and look for the loveable divine qualities in every person and created thing, we will find that we are more at peace with ourselves and everyone around us. 

In a treatise written by Abdu’l-Baha in 1875, he identified the different capabilities that an individual needs to develop to experience pleasure and peace. He explained that “the happiness and greatness, the rank and station, the pleasure and peace, of an individual have never consisted in his personal wealth, but rather in his excellent character, his high resolve, the breadth of his learning, and his ability to solve difficult problems.” 

It’s important that we strengthen and develop these qualities, as they enhance our personal happiness and peace and build the resilience that we need to navigate the challenging moments in our lives.

A Buddhist Quote About the Importance of a Peaceful Mind

It’s fascinating that breadth of learning not only fosters peace but that peace of mind is also conducive to greater knowledge. 

In the Dhammapada, the Buddha states, “If a man’s thoughts are unsteady, if he does not know the true law, if his peace of mind is troubled, his knowledge will never be perfect.” 

When our thoughts are flighty, unsettled, and anxious, it’s difficult to focus, think deeply, and meditate on divine guidance. So, we have to clear and calm our minds to receive greater insights and understanding.

Yogic, Buddhist, and Cherokee Quotes About the Importance of a Peaceful Heart

As a yoga fan, I enjoy the peace of mind and body that yoga often brings. However, I was even more excited to learn about the spiritual teachings that ancient yogis have shared about how important a peaceful heart is for fostering harmonious relationships.

In “The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali,” it says, “Where the heart is full of kindness which seeks no injury to another, either in act or thought or wish, this full love creates an atmosphere of harmony, whose benign power touches with healing all who come within its influence. Peace in the heart radiates peace to other hearts, even more surely than contention breeds contention.”

Likewise, The Sutra Collection, a sacred Buddhist text, asks us to abstain from calumny and slander —also regarded as grievous sins in the Baha’i Faith — and avoid repeating what would “raise a quarrel against the people.”

A Cherokee proverb beautifully captures this spirit of compassionate silence and open-hearted communication: “O Great Spirit, help me always to speak the truth quietly, to listen with an open mind when others speak, and to remember the peace that may be found in silence.”

Continuing in this spirit, The Sutra Collection concludes, “Thus he lives as a binder together of those who are divided, an encourager of those who are friends, a peacemaker, a lover of peace, impassioned for peace, a speaker of words that make for peace.”

A Taoist Prayer for Peace of Mind and Heart

“Lao-Tsu’s Peace Prayer” beautifully illustrates how important peaceful hearts are for creating a peaceful world. He wrote:

If there is to be peace in the world,

There must be peace in the nations.

If there is to be peace in the nations,

There must be peace in the cities.

If there is to be peace in the cities,

There must be peace between neighbors.

If there is to be peace between neighbors,

There must be peace in the home.

If there is to be peace in the home,

There must be peace in the heart.

A Baha’i Prayer for Peace of Mind and Heart

As we strive to cultivate inner peace, turning to prayer can be a powerful balm and refuge. The following Baha’i prayer offers profound words of solace and strength, imploring our Creator to renew your spirit and restore peace to your mind and heart: 

Create in me a pure heart, O my God, and renew a tranquil conscience within me, O my Hope! Through the spirit of power confirm Thou me in Thy Cause, O my Best-Beloved, and by the light of Thy glory reveal unto me Thy path, O Thou the Goal of my desire! Through the power of Thy transcendent might lift me up unto the heaven of Thy holiness, O Source of my being, and by the breezes of Thine eternity gladden me, O Thou Who art my God! 

Let Thine everlasting melodies breathe tranquillity on me, O my Companion, and let the riches of Thine ancient countenance deliver me from all except Thee, O my Master, and let the tidings of the revelation of Thine incorruptible Essence bring me joy, O Thou Who art the most manifest of the manifest and the most hidden of the hidden!

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Over the years, I’ve seen how the love between a couple can strengthen their spirituality and commitment to community service, and even heard stories from family friends about how their interracial marriages inspired relatives to overcome their racial biases and barriers.

These heartwarming and inspiring stories make me wonder: Do soulmates exist? And if they do, what is that exact moment when a person realizes that someone is the love of their life which they choose to spend eternity with? Did they experience an intense physical attraction, a strong emotional connection, a conscious awareness that this person had the spiritual qualities they have been looking for — or all of the above? 

RELATED: Interracial Marriage: A Love at First Sight Story

Merriam-Webster defines “soulmate” as “a person who is perfectly suited to another in temperament.” Although the word “soulmate” doesn’t appear anywhere in the Baha’i writings, Baha’is do believe that spouses should be so united as if they’re a single soul, so their union will last forever. As Abdu’l-Baha, one of the central figures of the Baha’i Faith, wrote, “husband and wife should be united both physically and spiritually, that they may ever improve the spiritual life of each other, and may enjoy everlasting unity throughout all the worlds of God.” 

With that in mind, I believe that God can lead us to our ideal match, if that is what we desire. I approach the concept of a soulmate as being the one you marry who you share a physical, emotional, and spiritual attraction and connection with. That’s why I decided to ask several Baha’i friends to share with me their stories of how and when they knew that they had met and found their “soulmates.” 

An Instant Soul Connection: Hoda and Sam Hosseini

Fort Lauderdale, Florida residents Hoda and Sam Hosseini instantly knew that they had each found their soulmate when they met. They met in 1983 at a Baha’i gathering when they were each 23-years-old. Sam says he watched as Hoda got up on the podium and began speaking about the spiritual capacity of young people.

“I liked her energy and the way she was representing herself,” Sam says. “Everything about her spirit grabbed me — it attracted me. I asked my brother, ‘Who is she?’” and my brother said, ‘Don’t mess with her.’” But after learning a little more about Hoda, Sam told his brother, “I’m not going to be fooling around. She’s going to be my wife.”

Hoda had a similar reaction when she first met Sam during one of the convention’s lunches. Her shoes were uncomfortable, and she was telling a friend about how her feet hurt. “And all of a sudden,” Hoda says, “I heard this guy say, ‘Yeah, if I was wearing high heel shoes like you, I would be in pain too. You should be wearing boots like me.’ And he had this Persian cowboy accent. I turned around and looked at him, and I saw his smile, and it’s just like my heart just sank. And then it was like, ‘Wow, he’s fine!’”

The first time Sam held her hand, they felt electricity. “We both got zapped,” Hoda says. “It was very special for both of us.”

“It was very clear that she is a strong character,” Sam says. “I’m a strong personality,” he adds. “I wanted someone that challenged me too to grow.”

Sam proposed to Hoda two weeks after meeting her on October 5, 1983, and they got married that following summer in 1984.

“You build your character, you develop your soul in your marriage, and you develop that unconditional love for another human being.” Sam says, “It’s something that will be eternal. It will last forever. It’s like fate.” So, when he asked himself which partner he would want to “go through the other worlds of God with,” he says he had one answer: “Definitely her.”

Becoming a Single Soul: Carmen and Culous Brown

The Baha’i writings say that God “made woman and man to abide with each other in the closest companionship, and to be even as a single soul. They are two helpmates, two intimate friends, who should be concerned about the welfare of each other.” 

That describes Carmen and Culous Brown, a couple living in Nashville, who have been married for 37 years. They met in 1985 when he was 20, and she was 22. They worked at the same restaurant — she was a college student who worked as a server, and he was a cook. Carmen wrote in an email that Culous “told the other coworkers, ‘That’s gonna be my wife one day.’ And the other coworkers told him, ‘Man, you ain’t gonna get her, she’s a college student.’ So, one day he was sitting at a booth at work, and he asked, ‘Would I join him for lunch?’ So, I did, and we’ve been together ever since.”

Carmen and Culous got to know each other for a year and a half before getting married in 1987. After reflecting on what made her realize that Culous was the one for her, Carmen wrote, “They say you look for your father in your male spouse. I can see some of the qualities in him, such as a provider, a protector, a hard worker. And you also try to find that mate to heal parts of you that were not healed with your father. Now I can clearly see that. I have someone who will not leave, no matter how difficult it gets. I have someone here who loves me unconditionally and will not abandon me no matter how I try to go into myself.”

RELATED: The Beauty of Having a Spiritual Relationship with your Partner

“Because we were young, in our early twenties, we had to grow up together,” Carmen wrote. And because they “started out as true friends” and they accept each other, they’ve been able “to work through all the trials we ran into.” Carmen explains that they “stayed married through [the] loss of a child, loss of both of our fathers, accidentally cutting off three of his fingers, and we are going strong. We really love and care for each other. One of my husband’s childhood friends told us a month ago, ‘When you see one (me or my husband), you see the other,’ and that’s beautiful.”

A Spiritual Bond Through Service: Oriana Vento and Nabil Grueso

Oriana Vento, 30, and Nabil Grueso, 28, didn’t know that they were soulmates when they first met in Haifa, Israel in 2018. But over time, their friendship deepened into something more.

“I remember well the day we first realized we wanted to get married,” Oriana wrote in an email. “We were eating at a vegetarian restaurant on the day of my birthday. I was living in Peru, and I went to visit him in Colombia. And during the whole trip, the feeling that we were doing the right thing felt so powerful, as if God was telling me: ‘This is the way! Keep going!’ We fell in love not only with each other, but also with the spiritual life and service we could have together, our ideals, life purposes, and our love for our Faith.”

And Abdu’l-Baha wrote that when Baha’is “undertake to marry, the union must be a true relationship, a spiritual coming together as well as a physical one, so that throughout every phase of life, and in all the worlds of God, their union will endure; for this real oneness is a gleaming out of the love of God.”

“It felt very evident at that point, besides feeling in love, there was a strong spiritual feeling that we were going down the right path,” Oriana added.

Oriana and Nabil, who live in Bogotá, Colombia, recently celebrated their fourth wedding anniversary. “I felt I could talk to him about my spiritual aspirations and ideals, about life and what I wanted from it, about me and life, and he understood completely,” wrote Oriana.

 RELATED: How Quarantining Is Helping Newlyweds Discover Their Dynamic

Love and Service: Anisa and John Everett

Grand Rapids, Michigan resident Anisa Everett, 27, first met her husband, John, 32, in 2013 at a community service conference for young adults in the Midwest. “John was one of the facilitators at the conference, and I immediately took notice of him,” Anisa wrote in an email. “He radiated the most pure-hearted joy. When he was in a room, he had a way of making everyone feel like they belonged; he even treated people he was meeting for the first time as though they were his most cherished friends.”

Anisa explained that they “weren’t always in the same group, so I did not have many chances to interact with him.” However, during a meal with about 10 other people, John showed such sincere compassion for another attendee who was upset that it made an impression on Anisa.

“Later that day,” Anisa wrote, “I remember thinking to myself that if there was someone I would marry without hesitating it would be him, not just because of his overwhelming spirit of joy, but also because of his sincere compassion for those around him, and his courage to do what was right in moments of difficulty.”

After the conference, Anisa moved to Israel to volunteer at the Baha’i World Center in Haifa, Israel and didn’t see John for another two years.

But, Anisa wrote, “Within weeks of my return from Israel, I found myself serendipitously crossing paths with John. Over the course of about a month, without knowing each other’s plans, John and I had consecutive encounters at three different gatherings in Ohio, Illinois, and Michigan — all of which centered on the theme of how young people can contribute to creating compassionate, inclusive, and just communities. Each of these encounters provided the opportunity to pray, study, and create plans together for how we would serve our communities.” 

RELATED: Love and Service: A Match Made in Heaven

Anisa explained that they were “inspired by the truth that ‘the betterment of the world can be accomplished’ simply by performing ‘pure and goodly deeds,’” As a result, they “each felt called to try to make a difference in other people’s lives, and were drawn to each other because of that shared vision.”

By the third time they met in-person, Anisa wrote, “I knew that John belonged in my life, and that he was the person with whom I wanted to walk a path of service for the rest of my life.” They’d talked about “a range of topics — from education, to the family unit, to career — but we had never expressed ‘interest’ in each other, beyond our mutual understanding of our profound respect for each other and desire to work together in service.”  

The Baha’i writings say, “Surely, all must today be called to love, to unity and to kindness; to integrity, to friendship, to fellowship and to divine worship. I hope that thou and thy dear husband may continue to serve in all spirit and fragrance and that in this world ye may remain two radiant candles and from the eternal horizon ye may glisten like unto two shining stars.”

During that third gathering, they decided to meet up to say prayers at sunrise. “After sharing our prayers, we decided that we wanted to consider getting married,” Anisa wrote. “Over the next several weeks, we spent a significant amount of time with each other’s families and in our respective communities, and each passing experience only served to confirm our understanding that we should get married.”

This summer will mark Anisa and John’s eighth anniversary.

So, whether you realize days, weeks, months, or even years after meeting them that you’ve found your soulmate, there seems to be a common thread between these stories: an undeniable knowledge that the spiritual bond you have with someone is one that will last for eternity.

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‘Corsets and Romance: Rediscover Passion, and Master the Art of Attracting Love’ is set for a new marketing campaign

HALIFAX, NS, Oct. 3, 2023 /PRNewswire-PRWeb/ — Lynn Sorge, PhD, wants to help those who become so unhappy in their relationship that even if they do recognize the cause, they have no idea of how to repair it, and where to begin. She also wants to help those who do not have a soul mate or loving partner in their lives, and are suffering from loneliness by laying out the means to find a partner without going online at all, instead drawing upon everyday occurrences to meet and get to know that someone special.

In “Corsets and Romance: Rediscover Passion, and Master the Art of Attracting Love”(published by Balboa Press in August 2022), Sorge presents a two-part story and guide that helps couples rediscover passion and romance, and leads singles of all ages to find lasting love. This book is divided into two parts. The first is a fictional account of a married couple who have lost their passion for each other, the problems within their relationship which this has caused, and the extreme lengths to which one of them goes to solve the problem. The second, non-fiction, is a step-by-step guide aimed at those who have not been successful at finding a loving partner, and succinctly lays out the steps one can take to find that special someone without using a dating site.

“Currently, we are living in a fragmented society where many of us live and communicate mainly online. In-person relationships appear to be becoming a thing of the past, and consequently, it is easy to become lonely and to feel isolated. Many of us miss touching and being touched by another human, and have become so accepting of our aloneness that we do not even realize something is missing from our lives,” Sorge says. “This book is intended to be an antidote to our solitude and sense of isolation. It is all encompassing in that it lays out and provides a practical and immediate solution to those in relationships where the passion that once existed has gone missing, while also providing a plan, including its practical application, for finding someone anew with whom to fall in love.”

When asked what she wants readers to take away from the book, Sorge answered, “I want them to realize that, regardless of how hopeless they feel their situation might be, there is always a solution to whatever challenge they might be facing. With a bit of creativity, honest communication, and the will to succeed, problems arising within an already-existing relationship can be solved. For those who have been unsuccessful at finding love, there is every possibility that employing suggestions from the tried and true blueprint offered in the book will very likely lead them to finding love and happiness with the person of their dreams. I also want them to understand that applying many of the concepts outlined in the book are applicable not only to their love lives, but also to many unrelated challenges they might face in their lives.” For more details about the book, please visit https://www.balboapress.com/en/bookstore/bookdetails/813771-corsets-and-romance

“Corsets and Romance: Rediscover Passion, and Master the Art of Attracting Love”
By Lynn Sorge, PhD
Hardcover | 5.5 x 8.5in | 142 pages | ISBN 9781982272722
Softcover | 5.5 x 8.5in | 142 pages | ISBN 9781982272708
E-Book | 142 pages | ISBN 9781982272715
Available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble

About the Author
Lynn Sorge, PhD, earned a BA from Dalhousie University, an MA from New York University, and a doctorate from Oxford Brookes University. She had a tenured position at Dalhousie University in the costume studies program for four decades, followed by an adjunct position in the faculty of graduate studies. This is her second book.

Balboa Press, a division of Hay House, Inc. – a leading provider in publishing products that specialize in self-help and the mind, body, and spirit genres. Through an alliance with the worldwide self-publishing leader Author Solutions, LLC, authors benefit from the leadership of Hay House Publishing and the speed-to-market advantages of the self-publishing model. For more information, visit balboapress.com. To start publishing your book with Balboa Press, call 844-682-1282 today.

Media Contact

Marketing Services, BalboaPress, 844-682-1282, [email protected], www.balboapress.com

SOURCE Balboa Press

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One day last spring I took a moment to look at the sky. It was a fair-weather day when the air was gentle and pure and, as Clifford Crawley once wrote of the cirrus clouds, “they sail like ships on high.”

I recovered a childhood memory, maybe 8 years old, sitting on the low wall bordering our driveway. I lay back on the grass and study those clouds overhead as they float past, billowing, changing shape in a slow boil. I look for an image I may recognize: bunny ears or perhaps a toad.

I‘m sure I had worries that day, the kinds that angst children have: Does Pammy really like me? Why can’t I hit Al’s curveball? But I was innocent of life’s true tests, able to put all other thoughts aside and spend time just WATCHING THOSE CLOUDS. I had no idea what a privileged life I was living.

That day last spring, I needed that memory. I was in a stress fog of vague origin. Perhaps it was the stockpile of spring chores on my list. Or maybe some pending medical tests. And there was always that morning that past February when I’d turned on my phone to read that two old friends had died within hours of each other. I went for a walk and did the math: Ninety years of friendships, gone. 

I saw in that child lost in the clouds a hint of mindfulness. I had toyed with mindfulness a few years back when I had a bit of surgery. It helped, but I’d since fallen away. I wasn’t good at taking the time to just be with time as it passed.

That day last spring I promised I’d try enjoying good moments when they presented, and less time worrying and hurrying when the world intervened. About two weeks later, I was handed a stark reminder of that pledge.

”

That day last spring I promised I’d try enjoying good moments when they presented, and less time worrying and hurrying when the world intervened.

dan lyksett

author

I was late packing for my five-day campout at Wyalusing State Park. I was late hitting the road. And when I got south of La Crosse I came upon a detour – bridge under repair – that sent me east instead of south. When I hit Viroqua, the detour pointed south again and then back west. I suspected I was being led in a large, time-consuming circle.

It was a fair-weather day with sailing clouds, and I was on vacation. But instead of enjoying the journey, I was pissed. They were messing with my self-imposed deadline. I spotted a wayside on the road ahead and decided to pull over and consult my gazetteer for a quicker, better, more self-serving route.

I pulled in and parked alongside an old stone marker, like an upright tombstone. It read “Black Hawk Trail.”

It continued: “At shallow pond 115 rods due south Black Hawk’s 700 Sac Indians encamped July 31, 1832. Soldiers found six decrepit Indians there and ‘left them behind.’ Lee Sterling in 1846 found a handful of silver brooches there, hence concluded those killed were squaws.”

I had stumbled upon the third of seven markers erected in 1930 tracing a tragic tale of misunderstanding, bad faith, ineptitude, and outright racism that culminated in the slaughter of hundreds of Black Hawk’s people in the summer of 1832.

I couldn’t help but scan the landscape for “a shallow pond 115 rods due south.” The political me was once again outraged at those who would deny us knowledge of the past to help us guide our future.

But I was also disappointed in myself. I was on vacation. I had food and shelter. I had an open road and fair skies. But I had taken my privilege for granted.

Before I got back behind the wheel, I made myself another promise. It was nothing life-changing or even something I expected to last beyond today. For the next few hours, I’ll enjoy my journey, no matter where it leads. I will take time to just breathe.

And perhaps, if I’m really lucky, I’ll even spend enough time watching the clouds sail overhead to discover bunny ears or perhaps a toad.

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For millions of readers around the world, self-help books offer a discreet, affordable way to access an array of psychological insights and therapeutic techniques.

Take a moment to browse your local bookshop or department store, and you’ll find books addressing everything from shyness and burnout to worry, weight loss and “the common cold of psychiatric ailments” – depression.

But do they actually help? And what’s the best way to find out?

Do self-help books actually help their readers?
Shiromani Kant/Unsplash

As part of a larger study, I interviewed 13 readers with a diagnosis of depression about their experiences with reading self-help books. They filled out a survey and then participated in extended one-on-one interviews.

With few exceptions, they recalled an initial phase of wanting “the instant gratification of being fixed”. But they persevered when reading didn’t provide immediate relief, finding that “realistic” expectations eventually yielded more positive and useful negotiations with self-help books over time.

Read more:
Explainer: what is depression?

Silver bullet or snake oil?

Numerous studies have considered whether self-help books produce results.

In some studies, clinical researchers have acknowledged the potential of self-help books as a viable treatment for depression. People may feel better after reading them.

In other studies, media researchers have described them as problematic – or even dangerous. People may feel worse after reading them.

Neither approach considers what happens when everyday readers choose self-help books for themselves – and read them whatever way they like.

Read more:
The rise of pop-psychology: can it make your life better, or is it all snake-oil?

Self-help means ‘help yourself’

What did my work with real-word readers reveal?

First, they’d learned to read selectively and strategically. They recognised that useful perspectives and advice might be embedded in larger narratives that are irrelevant, unhelpful or even harmful.

Even a “woo woo” book like The Secret could offer something of value, readers suggested, “because it’s a whole book”. One reader called their approach searching for a “golden thread”. Another insisted some books “are packaged in a lot of junk, but they do have valid, valuable information in them”.

Readers also read widely, picking and choosing from books about other topics to better understand how depression can develop and manifest. “I’m plugging together the gaps between those life experiences and depression,” one reader explained, “because everyone’s experience of depression, the source of it, is different”.

The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris topped the list when I asked readers to name a book they’d found helpful. The rest of the results were surprisingly broad, encompassing more than 200 titles with little overlap. They included everything from The Bhagavad Gita by Eknath Easwaran to Rising Strong by Brené Brown and Sandra Cabot’s The Liver Cleansing Diet.

Interestingly, most readers thought it was “only natural” there are so many self-help books on offer these days. You have to be discerning, they said, yet open to a book’s message – and willing to put in some work. “That’s what self-help means,” a reader pointed out. “It means help yourself: the book’s helping you, but you’re still doing the lifting.”

One reader observed, ‘the book’s helping you, but you’re doing the lifting’.
Thought Catalog/Pexels

Rather than accepting or dismissing individual titles outright, readers stressed “no one book is going to be right for anyone”.

Overall, they steered clear of “exploitative charlatans” peddling “wishy-washy” titles that “spouted gobbledygook” or cobbled together faddish terms and concepts. One reader described them as “books that take you everywhere but take you nowhere”.

Even when they sought out books with some kind of scientific or clinical basis, they avoided “purely scientific” discourse. And they criticised authors who alienated the reader with an impersonal tone, or bamboozled them with dense, esoteric or technical language.

A “good” self-help book, our conversations revealed, “took readers seriously” and allowed them to “connect the dots” for themselves. Self-help books were not a silver bullet. But they could help with depression if you knew what to expect of them – and when the worst symptoms had already passed.

Read more:
Can reading help heal us and process our emotions – or is that just a story we tell ourselves?

Reading between the lines

While typical research approaches often locate the helping power of self-help books between the covers themselves, a readerly approach suggests otherwise: self-help books can help when readers know how to get something out of them.

As my interviewees pointed out, however, a “healthy” or useful approach to reading develops over time. It also depends heavily on circumstance.

Readers are not always or already an “expert audience”, especially if someone is struggling with difficult symptoms. Self-help reading requires practice, perseverance and perspective. Sometimes, readers might simply come across the wrong book at the wrong time – or, happily, the opposite.

There is more to be written about the way people with a specific diagnosis choose and use self-help books.

But it’s too simplistic to think of self-help books as either good or bad. Different readers – at different stages – make use of them in different ways.

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Liberty University welcomed minister and former country music artist Granger Smith to Convocation on Wednesday to preach on the importance of denying oneself for Christ.

Smith, who performed his last concert on Aug. 26, spent 24 years touring before feeling called to leave behind country music to serve at his local church outside Austin, Texas. He is also an accomplished author and released his second book, “Like a River,” in August.

Smith began his message by telling the audience that he had been looking forward to speaking on Liberty’s campus.

“I understand the speakers are brought here to maybe bring an encouraging word or a little conviction, and I want you to know that you have already been that for me,” Smith said.

Reading from Mark 8:34-36, he spoke about the large role that sacrifice and “taking up the cross” plays in following God. He said sacrifice alone is not the means of one’s salvation, but instead the result of the work that God has already done.

“When Jesus said, ‘Deny yourself, take up your cross and follow me,’ in one sense He’s identifying a certain kind of person that can do that … not a person that has earned it, but a person that has died and then been reborn.”

In a similar vein, Smith noted that although the imagery of picking up a cross, an ancient form of execution, may not sound easy or enjoyable, following Christ is worth it.

Smith said he grew up in a Christian family but never learned to truly deny himself. He spent this time living in what he called “cultural Christianity,” in which he lived a comfortable life and eventually emerged on the country music scene. He found major success and attributed it to his own efforts instead of the grace of God.

Former country music artist Granger Smith spoke on living a life of sacrifice at Convocation. (Photo by Brooke McDuffee)

“Who gets the credit in your life?” Smith asked the audience. “I’m not asking for your culturally Christian influence to answer; I’m asking your heart. Why are you seeking the degree that you’re studying for right now? And for whose glory will you use it?”

Smith’s life drastically changed in 2019 with the death of his 3-year-old son, River, a point at which he “hit rock bottom.”

“When you hold a lifeless child in your arms, one that you love more than most things in this world, it will change you. You will question how much control you really have in your life,” he said.

Following the tragedy, Smith began searching for comfort many different places, including self-help books, devotionals, medication, therapy, and meditation. He finally found the answer while listening to a sermon on John 14 in his truck, and he was filled with a desire to pursue Christ and obey His commandments.

“It doesn’t take a lot of complex theology to say it this way: I like denying myself for His sake. That’s the difference between the old me and the new me,” Smith said. “Denying yourself as a Christian doesn’t mean forcing yourself to do things that you hate. It’s the opposite.”

In 2021, he put began acting on this conviction by leaving his successful record label, and he later decided to leave country music completely with one last tour over the summer. Addressing the question of why he could not just use his music as a means to share the Gospel, Smith said that playing music had become too much about his own glory.

“If I walked on stage playing music and nobody sings and nobody shows up, I would take that personally,” he said. “It’s about exalting myself then, and I need to deny that. Exalting myself doesn’t reconcile with the Gospel.”

(Photo by Chase Gyles)

“Many times, as Christians we have to give up things that aren’t inherently bad themselves. Music touring is not a sin in itself,” he added. “Neither is social media, caffeine, alcohol, or college football, but anything can become sin when it starts to hinder our walk with Jesus. So, we have to surrender that. That’s part of what it means to ‘deny yourself.’”

As Smith prepared to walk on stage for the last time as a country singer in August, he said he found comfort in the phrase, “Sept. 6, Liberty University,” because it signified the start of a new chapter in his life.

“(Liberty is) the first stage of the new stages in my life. This stage, this day, the phrase represented a sunrise of a new day and a new beginning,” he said. “(It was) something that gave me so much rest. Denying yourself for Christ is not a burden. It’s peace.”

Smith concluded his message by harkening back to the joy that he has found in sacrificing for Christ and comparing his life to that of the man in Matthew 13:44 who sold everything to attain hidden treasure.

“Following Jesus requires sacrifice,” Smith said. “It requires suffering. You will have sorrow, pain, temptation, and grief. In this world you’ll have tribulation, but take heart, Christian, because Jesus has overcome the world so that you could have joy through all of it, even after the unimaginable pain of losing a child.”

“Denying yourself, taking up your cross, and following Jesus is not at odds with your joy but in fact is the source of it,” he added. “Nothing in this world can satisfy you with the fullness of joy like Christ alone.”

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I’ve been away for a bit. When I returned to my office on Monday after six months, three things struck me. The first was how noisy politics is; specifically, the noise around the voice to parliament. Bam. Bam. Bam. Like a sonic boom, or better, a NutriBullet grinding fibrous plants indiscriminately.

The second insight was Anthony Albanese has developed a clearer pitch on the voice during the time I’ve been away. The third was Peter Dutton still has some Trumpian fan fiction he’d like to sell you. This voice is apparently “divisive” and “unknown”. I’m not sure if we were treated to the opposition leader’s “Canberra voice” pejorative specifically this week. But versions of it are still in the mix.

Many readers of this column are politically engaged (bless you all – I have missed you) and will have followed every single voice development over the past six months. You guys can fill me in, because I haven’t and I’m confident I’m not alone. Many civilians chose to hide from the deadening noise pollution generated at the intersection of political opportunism and preening brand journalism – particularly at the moment. Fake fights with a pontification chaser can be about as restful as nails clawing down a chalkboard.

People who study the mood of the nation tell me national bandwidth is limited. Everyone who isn’t returning from their European summer holiday in a business-class cabin feels up to their neck in adversity: higher borrowing costs, high power and petrol prices, rising rents – relentless cost-of-living pressure – coupled with the relentless stuff of life – demanding or insecure jobs, ailing elderly parents, kids who need attention.

The pandemic and the accompanying economic shock have pushed us off the sunny uplands and changed the psychology of the country; we’ve folded in on ourselves. People are hard to reach. If they are hard to reach, then they are hard to persuade.

So when strategists report that a lot of people are yet to give the voice any thought, I believe it. But Australia’s democracy dragnet is about to remove the option of sitting this issue out. The referendum to determine yes or no to the voice to parliament will be held on 14 October. We are entering the season of civic participation; the realm of forced choice.

This leads us to Albanese’s sharper messaging. His pitch is clearer because the prime minister knows difficult times make a values proposition – in this case giving the First Australians more visibility, status and agency in their own land – a difficult sell. Strategists say there’s a pathway to victory for the yes campaign, but it’s a narrow one. Some Labor folks are more optimistic about a victory than they were a month ago and the prime minister is by nature an optimistic sort. Copping volleys of abuse in their electorates, others feel the campaign is already lost.

Can Australians find the mindfulness in tough times, the requisite stillness, to listen, reflect and consider?

Albanese has focused his attention this week on reassuring the people tuning in for the first time and trying to coax soft no votes back into the yes column. Much of this courtship is playing out in FM radio studios, catching the commuters in cars who haven’t tuned out with Spotify.

For people coming at the concept cold, Albanese’s pitch is threefold: the voice is an advisory body, not this sinister plot you might be hearing about on TikTok; if you don’t know what the voice is, please find out – it won’t take much time; and voting yes will cost you nothing – “there is so much for Australia to gain”.

Albanese’s message to the soft nos is “don’t close the door”. The prime minister used this locution five times at the yes campaign launch on Wednesday. The next six weeks will be a pitched battle for the soft nos. Albanese and John Howard were bookends this week – the current prime minister with his don’t close the door exhortation at the Adelaide launch and the former prime minister declaring at one point when he was out and about: “If you are intending to vote no, hold hard to that intention.”

“No feels” is a gravitational current, a tide, carrying us to Dutton. Things are noisy and they will get noisier between now and mid-October, so let’s be clear about some things.

Public support for the voice started to wane after the Liberal leader declined to back the proposal. Indigenous Australians asked through the Uluru statement for a constitutionally enshrined structure – a voice – to end a couple of centuries of silencing. Dutton chose intraday politics. He coddled his base rather than reaching for the moment of national unity. After electing to stage the referendum as a partisan death match, Dutton now decries this “divisive” voice. (As if the current division wasn’t a core function of his political strategy. As if he’s a bystander.)

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Dutton’s voice claims explained: politics with Amy Remeikis – video

Persisting with his bystander fantasy, Dutton also decries an alleged lack of detail about the voice. This could be funny if it wasn’t a try-on. Dutton, one of the most senior parliamentarians in the country, is in the box seat to help shape the voice if Australians vote yes in October. The Liberal leader is a legislator in a parliament that will resolve the structure of the advisory body. Resolving the detail would, however, involve turning up for work; it would involve Dutton resolving to become something more interesting than a pastiche of wreckers past. At the moment Dutton is preoccupied with headlining the Tony Abbott Hits and Memories Tour; like Taylor Swift’s Eras, with fewer sequins and friendship bands.

Finally, there is Dutton’s disdain for a “Canberra voice” – a pejorative hurled by a person who has been (wait for it) holed up in Canberra since 2001, entirely confident he has a right to speak, be heard and to shape the national policy debate. If representative bodies based in the national capital are a swamp that must be drained, perhaps we should cancel the parliament?

Just because this behaviour is transparent doesn’t mean it won’t be effective. As I noted a minute ago, the yes campaign needs to be able to connect with people in order to persuade them and clamour is its own strategy. Flooding the zone with shit (as Steve Bannon would have it) is a means of obscuring nuance and truth.

I suspect direct contact with voters will matter over the next six weeks because the latest Digital News Report from Oxford University and the Reuters Institute tells us the proportion of people who say they avoid the news, often or sometimes, remains close to all-time highs. A lot of people are turned off by constant negativity. The 2023 research also suggests there has been an uptick in people sharing information through closed networks “where people can have private or semiprivate conversations with trusted friends in a less toxic atmosphere”.

Now we’ve entered the realm of forced choice, the questions ahead are obvious.

Are enough people in the right parts of the country open to persuasion if the yes campaign can deploy a large enough ground game – meaning door knocking and phone banking – to cut through the racially charged sludge on social media, the conspiracy theories and the thickets of straw men?

Will people be angry that compulsory voting forces them to make a choice about something that feels less pressing than their own, entirely legitimate, compounding stresses? Or can Australians find the mindfulness in tough times, the requisite stillness, to listen, reflect and consider?

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